XXL?

Believe me, before pregnancy, I wouldn't dream wearing size XXL, XL or even L clothes. I usually go for M, S, sometimes XS depending on the manufacturer. Before I continue, I hope I don't offend those with big size body. I have been a petite girl all my life, and trust me, being petite is no less frustrating than being big, from the petite girl's point of view.

A few days ago when I wanted to buy some tops for myself (since none of the pre-pregnancy clothes I have here fit me any more, and I wanted those with front opening, to ease breastfeeding while outings) so that I can look good when I go out. I can't be going out wearing my front opening pyjamas, right? I went to the local department store, and surely enough there were some tops I like. I asked for size M, L and XL to try on (I wasn't even sure on my size any more). In the changing room, I tried size M first. Usually with front opening tops I just undo the top two buttons to wear them. I did, and nope, didn't happen this time. I had to undo all the buttons to see if it fit me. I was stupefied to see that the left side and the right side didn't meet in the middle! Boobs too big!!!

I skipped L, and went straight to try XL. It was still too small, the left and the right side met, however the middle part kinda opened between the buttons, if you know what I mean. However apart from the area near the boobs, the top was really too big for me.

I really don't want to go for maternity clothes (I'm no more pregnant, and don't want people to think I'm pregnant, again!), but here they don't seem to have clothes for breastfeeding women! What to do, what to do?